my own very personal review of.....

The Telus World of Science!



Now that I'm not working so hard, I have time for frivolous activities like spending the day doing the same thing as all the Grade 4 students in Calgary....Science World.
I went down with Joe who seems to have the same work schedule as most of us bohemians but somehow makes 10 times the money. The top attractions of this lovely outing were:

1. Lego-Secrets of the Pharaohs

I bet you thought that learning about ancient Egypt, with all it's strange-headed gods and weird death rituals, is pretty interesting. You are so wrong. It is not half as interesting as learning about Egypt MADE OF LEGO. There is something sublime about seeing 10 identical yellow, blocky Lego slaves pulling a Lego stone to a Lego pyramid. Being whipped with Lego. Plus Lego funerary urns with Lego organs inside. (I presume, anyway. They did not actually show the organs, which is no fun.)Does anyone else think that whoever gets to build the Sphinx out of Lego has a pretty ideal job? Still, I feel like this exhibit is going to confuse small children later in life, in many ways.

2. Mindball

Mindball is my favorite new game. You and a friend sit on opposite sides of the table, wrap a headband with a cord around your head, and think concentrated thoughts at a ball in the middle of the table, causing it to roll toward the other person's goal. It can only be improved by making wavery science-fiction mind control noises as you do it. I am not exactly sure how the Theta waves of your mind are measured by a sweaty headband. But I am willing to believe. I think Mindball should be featured in every home. There should be a large Mindball table where you can play in groups, all of you sitting still with eyeballs bulging. I kicked Joe's ass of course.
Joe: "That doesn't mean anything."
Rhianna: "I think it means that I am one billion times smarter."

3. Bugs! A Rainforest Adventure.

This is a film we saw in the theater, following the lives of two bugs in the deep dark rainforest. Hirodula, a praying mantis, and Mushi, who plays both a catepillar and, eventually, a butterfly. To save you a lot of guessing, eventually Hirodula eats Mushi. A film ending at least on par with other Hollywood tragedies that feature the death of a main character, such as Harold and Maude or My Girl. The oddest thing about this movie is that it was narrarated by Dame Judy Dench...obviously your first choice of voice that you want to hear explain how the female mantis will bite of her partner's head during coitus. (Also, I feel it is okay to be a stickler for Science while at Science World, and neither of these insects are technically bugs).

4. The Bed of Nails

Nothing like teaching kids what fakers those fakirs were. By having a plexi-glass sheet you can lay on, which nails are raised up through so that you are laying on them. Not painful. Yet the small girl waiting her turn suddenly burst into tears and tried to hide behind her mother. "Look at that man, he's not crying, is he?", says the mother, and Joe obliged the girl with a large, "Look! The nails are comfortable as all git out!" kind of smile. Yet she still eyed her mother and Joe skeptically. She has probably seen grownups fake pleasure in the past to trick her, such as exclaiming "yum!" while eating broccoli at the dinner table.

Survery says? Learning is fun. And don't even think of challenging me at Mindball.