'tis the season to get busy
Heavens to Betsy! You don't think it's a coincidence that most people's anniversary is around Christmas, do you? That's because it's the time of year for romance....the time of year when everyone leaves their house, goes to parties, becomes imbued with holiday spirit(s), and don't even get me started on Mistletoe.
Actually, I've never even seen Mistletoe, much less been kissed by anyone in its presence. Where the hell in the world do they grow Mistletoe? Am I even spelling that right? Isn't it poisonous? Is poison romantic? Many questions arise....
Anyway, this past holiday season has been especially romantic for those I roll with...Kathleen is getting married (wedlock! yowza), Kaylen is getting chapped lips somewhere in the USA, Laine and Marsha are getting to be tame, settled relationship ponies, and me?
Me, I've been dating. December was open dating season, on me. I shan't say too much, but it has ranged from the bad (one guy who, through a slight misunderstanding, is under the impression I am a raging racist), the strange (finding out you have the same last name as someone you're on a date with), and the (quite possibly, we'll see) good.
So, who am I sleeping with this month?
A frog.
My sister has gifted me with a fuzzy frog which contains a hot water bottle. It has been going to sleep with my icicle toes and making me happy. And I have to say, that until I can replace the hot water bottle with the supple thighs of some young thing, it's a pretty damn good bedfellow.
I hope you all are sharing your bed with someone, or something, equally pleasant.
Actually, I've never even seen Mistletoe, much less been kissed by anyone in its presence. Where the hell in the world do they grow Mistletoe? Am I even spelling that right? Isn't it poisonous? Is poison romantic? Many questions arise....
Anyway, this past holiday season has been especially romantic for those I roll with...Kathleen is getting married (wedlock! yowza), Kaylen is getting chapped lips somewhere in the USA, Laine and Marsha are getting to be tame, settled relationship ponies, and me?
Me, I've been dating. December was open dating season, on me. I shan't say too much, but it has ranged from the bad (one guy who, through a slight misunderstanding, is under the impression I am a raging racist), the strange (finding out you have the same last name as someone you're on a date with), and the (quite possibly, we'll see) good.
So, who am I sleeping with this month?
A frog.
My sister has gifted me with a fuzzy frog which contains a hot water bottle. It has been going to sleep with my icicle toes and making me happy. And I have to say, that until I can replace the hot water bottle with the supple thighs of some young thing, it's a pretty damn good bedfellow.
I hope you all are sharing your bed with someone, or something, equally pleasant.
posted by Idoru at 1:29 AM
13 Comments:
Question....why have I not heard about ANY of these??
Question. . . . why have I not been ANY of these??
Especially "the strange"--I happen to excel at strange.
Brad, are you asking me out on a strange date? Because I happen to like strange. After all, you come medium-to-highly recommended. And I don't mind admitting I've been a little turned on ever since I saw those YouTube videos of you making out with guys. Hot. Not to mention the story about tongue kissing Grandma.
'Medium-to-highly' recommended? Have you been speaking with my mom?
My recommendations generally average around 'low-to-mediocre'--and that's prior to the introduction of my eccentric fashion stylings and wealth of fart jokes to the mix; that's when my ranking quickly drops to 'low-to-abyssmally low'.
You've dated your Mom? And she would recommend it? That might be a little too strange.
Don't knock it until you try it.
...do you think she'd go for me?
Maybe. . . do you like the music of Elvis Presley?
This is important.
hey, brad.
brad.
brad.....
guess what?
Your mom likes beaver hats.
You, Madam, are a total pervola.
Beaver hats--like my mom even knows what that means! She's a pure and innocent as the driven snow. . . nice try, Peratola.
Oh would you two just get a room, some people are trying to lurk here.
So. . . want to get a room?
isn't this sort of where we came in? of course I do. but let's do it soon...apparently we're confusing and agitating my blog readership.
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